When a person you care about is dealing with substance dependence, the situation can feel hopeless. Substance abusers often refuse to acknowledge their problem. Denial is especially common during the initial stages of dependence, while they are still able to derive some enjoyment from using. When they "hit bottom," substance abusers may go to the opposite extreme - talking about nothing but the problem, with tearful confessions and promises of change. Unfortunately, no matter how sincere the user may be in such moments, the first promises are often broken.
In dealing with these frustrations, it is important to realize that substance dependence is a disease that affects the way a user's brain works. The cravings to use are physically based, can be very strong, and often strike at those moments when a user's willpower is at its weakest.
Your understanding of the nature of addiction can help make a difference. When you feel betrayed - or angry, sad, or helpless - just knowing that addiction is a disease can help you to see your loved one's behavior for what it really is - symptoms of a disease that they may have little, if any, control over.